A prion [the acronym stands for: proteinaceous infectious particle] is the tiny rogue protein that lodges itself in gray matter and makes swiss cheese out of neural tissue. Mad Cow Disease [Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy] and Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease are caused by prions being introduced into the host - most often by consuming them in food. Tribes that practice cannibalistic rituals in New Guinea pass prions when a human host's brainmatter is smeared onto the body in order to receive the life power of the dead. In some cases, prions enter the body - and somehow migrate to the brain. The resulting disease is known locally as "kuru".
Prions are not a microbe. They are bits of folded proteins that have no way of reproducing themselves - but when they come into contact with other viable proteins, they twist the target into a reproduction of its physical form. Prions have no genes. They could be considered immortal. They could be anywhere.
We came up with a number of theories:
It was obvious that the failed government research on "organic compression" technology during the 50's had accidently been released into the environment, migrating around the globe with shipments of livestock, meat, and produce.
We then shifted gears and figured it was the result of nuclear testing in the South Pacific and Southwestern US. Military rations, in particular any type of protein supplement, had been twisted into these new prion forms by irradiation. The food was then eaten by troops and/or scattered to the local populace - this spread the prions from their birthplace. Animals eating any prion infected substance would spread them further. And the military had kept this quiet, much like what had happened with the many deaths due to accidental exposure to radiation during the nuclear tests.
We discarded the above theories due to the inelegance of the global distribution issue - prions are widespread - and somehow had to work their way into the local ecologies of countries separated by Oceans. It had to be this: Engineered proteins developed by the Germans during World War II as biological weapons unlimited by the Geneva Convention. The prions were spread via V2 rockets, cloudseeding, and/or immigration. Although using human hosts as carriers had inherent problems - eventual madness and a way to spread the prion effectively to the next host. We had visions of people being fed to livestock as a way to reinfect the populace. Far-fetched - but a good story.
Next.
They came from space. Fallen from the skies, they entered the food chain and stayed there, trying to reproduce for some dark and sinister purpose. What would happen if a prion infection ran full course and converted an entire host's viable proteins? What would the true form of these alien invaders look like?We axed that idea - too Hollywood.
And then it dawned on us. Prions are the remaining particles, the fully decontructed primal components of the gods of the ancient world. Babylonian, Egyptian, Greek, Roman, Norse...when mankind stopped worshipping them, they fell apart, and only exist now in their near immortal singular forms. Could the gods be called back? Could we collect all the prions into one place and rebuild myths? Are the old gods infecting the living with madness because they are no longer themselves? As revenge? Should we start a movement to pray to the old gods, to save ourselves?
I think it may be wise. Just in case.
5 comments:
I worry about the zombies. Y'see, when those pesky little prions are floating around down from space and get in the water and fields and so on, they're kinda harmless, maybe make the meat a little funny. It's when they concentrate they cause real damage. Now, I'm as into brains as the next guy, and when you've got your worst enemy dead in front of you, I can see the logic in stealing his power. But factory farming concentrates prions, just like it concentrates other contaminants. Mad cow is just the beginning.
Now, when those pesky little critters all get together and start working all at once, they warp the protiens of the nervous system not into 'spungiform', but a coherent lattice of prions, down to the core of the nerve, the heart of the brain. If it happens all at once, the prion lattice duplicates the nervous system, and provides pathways for nervous impulses. At first, it seems that the victim recovers, but then; madness! A hunger for brains. This is not the loved one bitten by a zombie minutes ago, this is a degenerating colony of protinaceous matter acting in concert which only wants one thing; more nervous tissue to convert to sustain the ephemeral prion lattice. More brains! Aim for the head, use fire if necessary. Avoid physical contact.
Are these the fast zombies [a la "28 Days"] or the slower, how to say, more focussed, determined zombies [a la "Shaun of the Dead"]?
It's important to know. Different strategies for different opponents.
This makes sense to me. I always liked 32-Dimensional beings. They're such a hoot - make me laugh and laugh and laugh. But move down the line to those 41-Dimensional beings. They give me a headache - and I can't deal with the sar, strunch, and squinch.
Bad bad nasty little strings of omino acids.....
Tums anyone?...maybe not
I belive that the only enzime that will brake up these protines is in cardbord. But due to the lack of pallet appeal we are doomed. I guess it is better to eat the box the cereal comes in as apposed to the cereal itself.
I like cereal. And boxes. It stands to reason I'd like cereal boxes as well. With milk. And bananas. :)
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